If – prefer me – friend wanted an ext after you check out the Fifty Shades that Grey Trilogy, this blog is for you. I compose fan fiction based upon E together James's gripping books and more. Fifty Shades Meander is a multi thing story that proceeds in the same vein as the originals and, along with some one shooting stories, are uncovered in the sidebar. I additionally host a book club ~ above Sundays. This blog includes mature content – strictly over 18's!


*

Leaving me dazed he deals with his staff when more. “Hot wife,” the grins, looking sheepish as he tilts his head in my direction. The holds out his hand for chris to take, and also with that we stride off, leave the giggles, sighs, and also whispers behind.

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I might kiss the again! way to display the world, at the very least the one at Grey Enterprises, that we space solid. I doubt there will certainly be any much more gossip around my fidelity or the alleged break-up in our relationship from anyone that witnessed that.

At house I kick turn off my shoes and also swap my work-related wear because that a pair the comfy yoga pants and a sweater. Ns looking forward to the weekend; they it seems ~ to it is in so much less stressful 보다 our weekdays. Chris has one more playdate tomorrow, this time v a little boy he met at the GEH daycare, Christian has promised to spend some quality time through us, and also of course tomorrow is Mia’s huge night. A chill weekend will do us all good.

The vibration of mine phone top top the bed breaks me out of my hopeful thoughts, and also when I view Kate’s challenge on the display screen I flop top top the bed, settling in for a good long chat.

“Kate! an excellent timing. How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” she peeps in a small voice, telling me the she’s noþeles but.

“Heyyyy. What’s up?” i ask gently, mindful not to revolve the wobble i heard into actual waterworks.

“I’m freaking out,” she admits, still teetering ~ above the brink that a sob. “Next week is D-day and also I don’t know exactly how I’m walking to manage a an unfavorable result, if I deserve to handle it in ~ all.” On her last words she voice cracks, giving method to the flood of problem I hear in her fearful tears.

“Oh, Kate,” i breathe together my very own heart twists for my friend. What perform you say to that? i don’t have any kind of guarantees for her. Like her, i only have actually hope, yet hers seems to it is in dwindling. All I deserve to do is share she hurt, and be brave for her when she is not. “We’ll cross the bridge when we gain there. Yes sir no allude in being worried about something the hasn’t happened. And also if you room pregnant, stressing isn’t great for either of you.”

“I guess,” she claims lamely, sniffling quietly.

“Kate, honey,” i soothe, “even if the results are negative, this is only your very first try. And also didn’t girlfriend tell me the the physician said the you were great candidates because that the treatment?”

“He did,” she confirms wearily, “but I want it for this reason badly, Ana. Elliot desires it for this reason badly. I understand I would certainly feel prefer I’d failure him.”

My totality being fills with sympathy because that her. Though not to the exact same extent, I got an inkling of what she’s feeling the work Christian do me take it the pregnant test. Looking right into his excited face, there was a moment when we were waiting for the outcomes where i felt the load of his expectation on mine shoulders. Ns was so scared the his world would break if the outcomes were negative, and also that the blame me.

“Elliot loves you, Kate – through or without babies. And even if it stops working this time, you’ll try again. At least you have options. The not like the case is hopeless.”

On the other finish of the heat Kate blows her nose. “You’re right. The course, she right,” she says, obviously do the efforts to to convince herself. “I just can’t seem to be rational at the moment. This freaking hormones are making me crazy!”

Weakly us giggle together. “I hear you, girlfriend,” i muse drolly. “Been there, excellent that. Oh, wait! i’m still act that!” This time us share a suitable laugh, simply two friends coming to grips through all the things that make us female, and sometimes a tiny nuts.

After my chat v Kate ns go in search of my boys. I can hear chris chattering come Gail in the kitchen, but prior to I get there Christian call me right into his office as I happen the open up door the his study.

I do my method around his workdesk where he pulls me ~ above his lap. “Justice is served,” the grits, reflecting me the page on the tablet computer in his hand.

Quickly I read the retraction native the rag mag ns swore never ever to support again, but sadly, it feels prefer too little, as well late.

*

I need to admit that the full-page blurb is hard to miss. The black color letters stand out versus the red background, calling come the reader to review the short message. And who no curious about a retraction, particularly if it mentions us? probably that is what irks me the most. Also a withdrawn declare is tho a reminder that what the initial statement said.

“Thank you,” ns say, turning into his heat chest and ducking mine head under his chin.

Sensing the interior struggle I’m having actually with the whole issue, he bands both arms about me. “The reporter has lost her job, and the publisher is looking at a hefty settlement. I recognize it seems empty now, however it does show that we’re serious, and also though you have the right to expect the strange bitchy article, they’ll think long and also hard before they spew any kind of unfounded crap again.”

We lapse into a thoughtful silence together I sit over there curled up on his lap, acquisition comfort native the unshakable current of strength he exudes. Tenderness he strokes my hair while my mind flits about the whole debacle once I jolt. V my brain thinking clearly, I suddenly realize why ns feel for this reason lousy about the entirety thing. Ns untangle myself indigenous him and also sit up. “You recognize what I dislike the most?” ns ask, lifting my eye to meet his.

Christian no speak. With the shared understand of a jar spouse, Christian understands instinctively that my concern is rhetorical, and that I just want to get the words turn off my chest. He combs his fingers with the escaped strands that hair that’ve come away from mine ponytail and gives me the silent assistance to continue. “I hate that she made me a awful person.”

He cocks his head and also quirks his brow, prompting me to describe further. “I’ve never ever been responsible because that someone shedding their job. Clearly I dislike that she lied, however she might have a family, friend know?” Ashamed, i drop mine gaze and also toy v the hem of my sweater.

“Baby,” he murmurs, cupping mine jaw to lift mine face. His expression is tender together he strokes his thumbs follow me my cheeks. “Your compassion is beautiful, however people can’t keep bumbling about like unsupervised toddlers when they’re adult playing in a grown-up world. She make a choice, and given who we are, she must’ve weighed the risks. The point to remember below is that she do the decision come run through the story, in spite of her full knowledge that it was entirely fabricated. Ours actions have consequences, and also it’s a gross monitor on humanity’s component that she only discovering that now. In fact, she have the right to be glad the she only shed her job.”

I don’t want to dwell ~ above what the last component means, however I deserve to see his point, and also I’m grateful for the peace it brings me. Probably it is a an excellent idea to make an example of her so ok never need to feel prefer this again.

Saturday morning look at Christian and me lazing at the dining room table when Chris and also his playdate friend, Jonathan, play in a blanket and also pillow ft that Christian developed for them roughly the sectional in the good room. Castle hide from each other, giggle, and also tumble over the huge couch as little boys do, and also I love it. I love watching them, and if mine husband’s grin is anything to walk by, he’s likewise feeling the happiness of the moment.

“They’re for this reason cute,” ns quip dreamily as I worm my toes onto Christian’s lap. That chuckles quietly as I nudge him through my feet, silently hinting because that a massage.

“They are,” that confirms, curling his warm hands around my arches and working his fingers right into the meat of mine soles.

With a sigh i close my eyes. “Hhhmmm. The feels sooooo good.”

As if nothing provides him better pleasure 보다 seeing me happy, that kneads harder, seeking the end the pleasure points and also making me purr in contentment. It’s likewise the perfect possibility to carry up a couple of things I’d like to comment on with my despotic man, however I think i’ll ease right into the tricky conversations by beginning with a less contentious one.

“Anything brand-new on the renovation front?” i ask lightly, keeping my eyes closed.

“All on monitor according come Elliot. They had actually some concerns sourcing the rock tiles because that the patio, and we still have to make a decision around whether or not we desire to be able to enclose the veranda in wintertime, probably with bi-folding glass doors, yet other 보다 that, it appears we’re collection for at an early stage March.”

Lifting mine head I open up my eye to snare mine husband’s gaze. “Really? that’s wonderful!” i can’t aid the pleased smile curving my lips. Moving right into the home on the sound feels favor it could be a new beginning because that us, an additional full circle we’ll be drawing, and a new chapter to fill v happy memories.

Christian’s comment beam is equally delighted, and his eyes space glinting. “I love see you happy, Mrs. Grey.”

My love squeezes in a half-elated, half-pained clench. Yes, fine be happy there, yet I want more. I have the right to so easily picture us there – my little family, but I additionally want to view Kate and Elliot, Mia and Ethan, and also lots of little cousins because that Chris and also our brand-new baby. I want to watch Grace and also Carrick, mine mom and also Bob, and my dad frazzled native chasing liven toddlers roughly the meadow. I desire to hear the laughter from the sheer happiness of being together as a family.

I’m not ready to lose this precious time with my husband, for this reason I push my nose-diving thoughts aside, hold on to my smile, and broach one more topic. “Do friend know just how Elliot is stop up with the IVF? Kate is an extremely nervous around next week.”

“I deserve to imagine, and no. Elliot hasn’t said much but he’s grumpy as fuck. Last week I sent out Bastille out to my parents’ location to view if kicking the shit out of other would boost his mood.” he chuckles and also runs a hand with his hair. “Claude claimed he had actually his work cut out. He claimed Elliot functioned the punching pads to death.”

That’s mine husband, ever before thoughtful, ns muse proudly. “That was a nice point to do,” ns coo, leaning forward to kiss his nose. “I’ve additionally been thinking around our baby.” my look cut away indigenous his to hide my apprehension. I understand he’s no going to favor what I desire to say.

“Oh?” he claims in a voice warm and also honeyed currently that we’re ~ above his favorite subject.

“Yes,” ns confess carefully, feather up in ~ him through my lashes. “You understand I had some… uhm… complications through Chris’s birth, right? every little thing happened so fast after that and also with the emergency cesarean, ns feel favor I let go the entirety thing.”

Weariness steals over his features. “Where room you going with this, Ana, since I certain as hell hope it’s not where I think that going?” gone is my laugh man, and in his location I have actually one that’s looking decidedly mad as he clenches his jaw, holding on come what have to be his fraying control.

I counting it together progress. At the very least he’s hearing me the end – sort of. “I desire to try having this infant naturally.” My teeth pinch mine bottom lip as I clock him unravel and also then, to mine surprise, rein himself back in.

His lips thin right into a chop line, and also the push of his organize on mine feet is as strained together his emotions appropriate now. “I don’t prefer it, Ana. You’re putting me in a position where ns potentially need to choose between you and something else, and also as much as ns love this unborn child, yes no contest for me. Can you know that?”

Wow. It is a much better reaction than I expected. Much less than the full-blown war I thought I’d have actually on mine hands ideal now. Finally my control-freak husband is acquisition my needs into account. Relieved and also deeply touched, I framework his challenge in my hands. “Yes, I totally understand, and I’m happy to comment on it at size with Dr. Malone and any other experienced that might help us make the decision. Ns don’t want anything bad to occur to us either,” ns breathe sincerely, patting my abdomen through one hand. “But I perform want come look into the possibility.”

I have the right to see his nerves room stretched taut, and the fight raging in his darkening eyes. “We deserve to talk come Dr. Malone, however I desire you come promise me that you’ll abide by the the safest option. No fighting the outcome. I’m not taking any type of fucking dangers with you and this baby.”

Inside i breathe a sigh that relief. “That’s every I’m questioning for.” Leaning into him i brush my lips versus his. “Thank you, Christian.”

“Hmf,” he grumbles and also his eyes slit in warning in ~ me, yet nothing deserve to hold ago the bubble of pleasure that pops on my confront with a smile.

Progress indeed. Christian is learning and also growing.

We autumn into a quiet spell however it’s peaceful and also I relish just being with him. Us do much too little of this, and also it’s doubly nice to be able to watch kris together. However even in the great moments, the poor is constantly haunting the jumble of mine thoughts, and also it doesn’t take long for mine mind come wander to José. “What will happen with Chris’s name readjust if us can’t monitor José under or if the refuses come surrender his parental rights?”

Instantly Christian’s demeanor changes, going from serene to rigid together the speed of rage I check out on his confront streaks v his body. I recognize his ton is measured only for my sake once he replies. “If he no relent, he’s looking in ~ a fine and then jail time past that, and if us can’t track him down, the judge will certainly make a call based on the truth of the case. He has actually the genetic proof top top file; there yes, really is no gray area here.”

I’m quiet chewing top top that when Chris and also Jonathan come barreling to the table. “Daddy, Daddy, it’s time!”

“Time because that what?” v an exaggerated gesture Christian shrugs, playing dumb, and easily brushing off his blackening mood indigenous a second ago.

Chris take away his forearms and points come the clock an installed on the wall. “Look! friend said once the hands space together on optimal we can have a supwise!”

“I did?” Christian teases, pushing his lips together to hold earlier his laugh.

“Yes! Yes!” lock cry in unison, every of them acquisition a organize of one of Christian’s arms in an initiative to traction him indigenous his chair.

“Oh, yes, i remember now! ns was going to eat you for lunch!” with a growl that stands and also the small guys scatter, squealing delightedly as they duck the end of his way.

Just once they’re out of his reach, the looks come me. “Awww. I wanted to take the boys to gyeongju mini speed watercrafts in the pool, however now ns guess I’ll need to go alone.” when he issues a dramatic sigh, castle come to run back, howling a chorus that noes.

With a tiny boy dangling like a monkey off each of his arms, Christian heads the end to Escala’s indoor lap pool with Collins and also Carl in tow. He is booked out the entire an are for the following hour, simply so they have the right to race their watercrafts along the lanes.

My love warms see them having actually fun, and I love the Christian is keen to spend time with his son, bonding. And also while they’re doing their guy-stuff, I’ll be baking. This baby and I have been craving cacao chip cookie all mainly long.

When the guys come ago they babble excitedly around all their fun, boast around beating Christian, and also wolf under still-warm cookies v milk prior to Jonathan’s mom, Susan, collection him.

Reflecting ~ above the day, I can only feel grateful once Christian and also I wander earlier into the apartment after see them off, yet that feeling slips away once we fulfill Taylor waiting for united state in the kitchen.

“Sir, a indigenous please.” some unspoken message passes between them. Christian squeezes mine hand and also then takes off in the direction that the study.

I stare after them, wondering if I need to be satisfied v the victory I had today, or if I must push because that more.

Start as you median to finish, come the reply from mine subconscious, and also I’m inclined come agree. Every little thing it is, it’s sure to impact all that us, and also my obstinate side refuses to it is in nuzzled the end of the loop.

In the study Christian is swiping at a tablet screen, muttering expletives as an annoyed-looking Taylor city hall on. “I don’t want to save fighting because that the best to be consisted of in whatever is walking on in ours lives,” i admonish in a firm voice, prepared to do so if I have actually to.

Christian scrubs his face with his hands climate blows the end a nervous breath. “You don’t must see this crap, baby. That meaningless and it only harms you,” he cautions in a bid to readjust my mind.

Oh no. Mine gut rolls and my heart sinks. It’s another article, and also judging by mine husband’s face, it’s also worse than the last one. Ns shake mine head and round his desk. “What now? much more infidelity?” maybe if I gain a feel for what it says beforehand, it won’t be together a blow.

He takes mine hand, lacing our fingers, and also pins me v a involved look. “Once you view this, the will remain with you, and I’d lot rather girlfriend pay attention to what ns feel for you than read the shit these human being write.”

He may really well it is in right, but at the exact same time, I hate not knowing what i’m up against. “Show me,” i croak hoarsely before I have time to rethink.

*

Holy shit. Gasping and shocked to the main point I discover the nearest seat, which happens to it is in on Christian’s lap. Without a word he wraps me in his arms as if to shield me from the pain and also humiliation. It’s favor this mrs saw right into my head and also dragged the end every among my insecurities, and also then scathingly shared them through what feels favor the whole world.

I can’t also cry. I’m too shaken. “Why would certainly someone compose something favor that?” i whisper, no really expecting solution from Christian.

“Fuck,” that spits. “This, ideal here, is exactly what I try to protect you from, why I like to have manage over what girlfriend see and what you don’t. I hate that they hurt you, and also they execute it since of me. This tabloid reporters, particularly the women, room a catty bunch the loves nothing more than come rip who to piece for breakfast. The what sells. Please, baby, shot not to take it it personally.” the drops a kiss on mine head, breath in mine scent together he hold me close.

Strangely, the understanding that it’s a cooking recipes they follow for the sake of sales alone renders it seem much less like a an individual attack and much more like the inescapable price one pays for fame, virtually like a hazing, however I can not deny the it harms like hell. Flynn and also I have worked so hard to earn back my confidence, and to have this human that i don’t even know take the away from me is unfathomable.

One that Flynn’s many mantras pops right into my head: you might not constantly be maybe to select what happens to you, but being a victim of your circumstance is a choice. It’s an excellent advice, for sure pertinent, however damn tough to take. I absolutely feel victimized.

I may not favor it, yet I have the right to live with people being envious that me. Top top the surface ar of our lives, it must seem that we have everything, particularly with Christian’s wealth, yet the believed that there are human being out there who believe he might have done better than me is as an individual as the gets. It’s likewise the insecurity that I’ve dealt with most come overcome, the one that still torments me most. I’m virtually sure ns wouldn’t feel poor if this reporter shed her job. Pity yes no recourse for gift a skank.

“It’s no all bad,” Christian supplies, breaking into my thunderous thoughts as he strokes mine back.

I snort, detect it difficult to see also the thinnest sliver the a silver lining.

“Just have actually a look,” he says, pushing his lips against my hair. Through his free hand he swipes far the offensive short article to display me another.

*

Oh my. Our little scene in ~ the office also made it into the tabloids. And I view what Christian means. At the very least this one is lot kinder, however still. What an invasion of our privacy. It appears I’m going to have actually to uncover a way to live with the day-to-day gossip the surrounds us.

Tonight Christian pulls an additional rabbit indigenous his hat when he leads Chris and also me come the media room because that a movie night. I have the right to only smile at his effort to provide us other so really conventional.  While this may be a perfectly simple evening for many families, the a novelty for us. Kris has limited TV time, and for us there never ever seem come be sufficient hours in the day to watch anything.

Grinning, i take up the center seat on the couch, stretch my legs out in prior of me, and snag a big bowl of popcorn because that myself. “Good thinking, Mr. Grey.” i wink up at him and pat the seat on either side of me, inviting my men to join in.

Chris whoops then jumps top top his spot, curling right into my side. Mine husband look at on in amusement before he takes up his seat on my other side. With his arm extended behind me along the ago of the couch, ns waste no time obtaining comfortable versus him and enjoying the normality that the situation.

The movie could be animated however it’s great, the ideal an option for united state to watch together a family. Perfect, just like my husband and this blessed time i’m spending v my family.

I’m surprised Chris provides it with the first half that the film prior to he falls asleep. He’s had actually a long and also exciting day, to add it was well past his bedtime once we started watching. He is obviously exhausted, however in contrast, his daddy is vast awake and also apparently enjoying this rarely viewing treat because when the first movie ends, that cues up another for us to watch.

I cuddling closer, enjoy it his heat and the reassuring to win of his heart versus my ear. It’s therefore comfortable, and it’s not long prior to I too begin to feel my sheathe droop v the have to rest. Just as I give in to the tempting call of sleep, i’m jarred from slipping into dream people by the sound that the phone, the quiet buzz indicating a speak to coming from within the apartment.

“Taylor,” Christian snaps as that answers, his tone clearly stating his annoyance at gift disturbed in ~ this so late hour. I can already feel his human body hardening v tension, so ns sit up to give him space. Instantly the dreamy stickiness of sleep melts away from me when I capture the ton of Jason’s clipped words. No means would he intrude on our night if it wasn’t important, and a 2nd later I have my confirmation.

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Christian jumps indigenous his seat and drags a tense hand through his hair. “What the fuck execute you mean, she’s missing? whereby the hell is your protection team in every one of this?” he yells, already taking long strides out of the room, no doubt to satisfy his right-hand male in the middle of whatever brand-new crisis lies ahead.