… and also what’s the attend to the entirety “multiple the 18” thing?

Don’t worry, this post will get rid of all her confusion…

How lot Money should You provide for a Bar/Bat Mitzvah?


You should provide the Bar Mitzvah money in multiples the $18. The number 18 converts to “Chai” (חי) or “life” in Jewish numerology. Essentially, you’re blessing the young boy/girl through a long & successful life.

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For example: instead of offering $50, provide $54. Instead of $100, provide $108 and also so on…

“OK, but how lot should I give EXACTLY”?

First the all, store in mind that a Bar/Bat Mitzvah is no a wedding…so nothing be in a rush to take out a mortgage for your Bar/Bat Mitzvah cash gift.

Remember: You’re getting a gift because that a teenager. They don’t require a most money, nor need to they obtain used to gaining lots that money at such a young period (just my personal opinion).

When you’re trying to decide just how much money come give, ask yourself:

How close are you to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah or his family?What are the social & cultural habits that this family or community?How an intricate is this Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony?

If you barely understand the kid and also his family, climate $50-$100 (or $54-$108) is absolutely OK.

However, if you’re your uncle and the Bar Mitzvah is in ~ the Hilton, then the gift lot can cause you to shed your “favorite uncle” status.

A great rule of ignorance is to take the amount girlfriend would’ve typically spent top top a birthday present and also multiply that by 1.5. So, if friend would’ve spent $100, climate $150 sounds about right (or $144 to stay in line v the “multiples the 18″tradition).

Here’s a table come clear the end the confusion:

RelationshipGift Amount
Classmates & Friends$50-$75 ($54-$72 in multiples of 18)
Distant relatives or Acquaintances$50-$100($54-$108 in multiples of 18)
Close family members & Friends$100 or higher

Tip: The exact same holds true if you’re not physically attending the ceremony. Sure, you might technically be able to “get away” without sending out anything. Yet ask yourself this: “If the situation was reversed – would you like it if who close to you didn’t attend her child’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah, and also didn’t send a gift on height of it?”

Per person or Total?


Claire asked a very an excellent question in the comments: “Is the gift amount given per person?”.

The price is: usually, yes… yet it depends:

What if you’re attending through kids?What if it’s a remote relative?What if he’s having actually his Bar Mitzvah in his backyard?

Obviously, there’s nobody answer. The said, in most cases, you’ll main point the gift amount X headcount.

Confused? Here’s an example:

Let’s say you’re invited to a Bar Mitzvah ceremony of a far-off relative, and also he’s having actually it in a nice occasion hall. You’re planning come attend together a family of 4 (husband, wife and 2 kids)…

If we follow the rules of thumb over – then us fit the “Distant loved ones or Acquaintances” bracket, which means we have the right to settle because that anything between $50 – $100 every person. To keep things simple, let’s go through $72.

Now, because we’re attending with 2 kids, then it’s entirely acceptable to offer somewhere between fifty percent and 2/3 the amount you’d offer as an adult: let’s work out for $54 per child.

So, finally, ours “complicated” math formula translates to: $72 x 2 + $54 x 2 = $252.

(Ugh, I dislike math).

$252 is the lot I’ll withdraw from the ATM… or, probably write a check?

This leads us to the next question…

Cash or Check?


Bar/Bat Mitzvah or no – don’t forget the at the end of the day – it’s a teenager we’re talking about here. And let’s simply say that teens aren’t exactly famous for your intelligent fiscal policies.

If you’d rather provide the money to the parents and also have them decide just how to invest the money – it’s much better to go v a check, fairly than cash. Kids at the age of 12-13 typically don’t carry checks, and also they’ll usually require the aid of your parents come cash it. In result – you’re ensuring the money goes through the parents first.

On the flip side, if friend do want the Bar/Bat Mitzvah to spend the money together they check out fit – then cash is the wanted choice.

Should You provide Money, to begin With?


Even though a cash gift is a very popular one, it’s much from the just option.

So, what else have the right to you lug to a Bar/Bat Mitzvah?

In fact, if you recognize the young Bar/Bat Mitzvah, then probably you’re better off getting an proper Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah gift instead.

Think around it – a huge part of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah storage is the gifts you obtained from her friends and also family… trust me – nobody remembers the man or festival who gave money in increments the $18, as with everyone else did (unless you offer a ridiculously high amount, in which situation they’ll never forget you).

If you currently know the young Bar/Bat Mitzvah, friend probably understand things like:

What carry out they choose (and don’t like)?How religious are they?What sort of presents will their parents appreciate?

Think about that prior to you decide to give them cash or a check.

Tip: Another good idea I’ve seen world do in the previous is to obtain the Bar/Bat Mitzvah a nice Tzedakah box, and chip in the very first $18 (or more, depending on how generous you feel the day). That way, you acquire to have actually the cake and eat that too. Plus, friend teach castle a an useful lesson around the importance of offering Tzedakah.


A Bar/Bat Mitzvah awareness is a big deal… and deciding how much money girlfriend should offer can it is in challenging… however it doesn’t have to be.

Remember, it’s tho a 12 or 13-year-old teens we’re talking around here, therefore no must go crazy and give away ridiculous amounts.

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Just remember to monitor the guidelines ns laid the end in this article, provide the child a decent Bar/Bat Mitzvah gift amount (in multiples that $18) – and also you should be golden.